Morning Paper

Death by Shark...it's in my top ten for worse ways to die!!

I got start this post by offering my condolences to the Groh family for their loss, BUT, when you do cageless dives with dangerous sharks, what in the bloody hell do you think is going to happen? You couldn't pay me to even go into the Ocean, I don't do beaches, snorkling, scuba diving, shark dives, catamarans, surfing, or boogie boarding, if I can't see the bottom or touch the sides, no way will you get my ass to do any of these things! I am all about having a good time and being adventurous, but some things are non-negotiable. Jim Abernathy of Jim Abernathy's Scuba Adventures is known as a vanguard in Tiger and Hammerhead shark interactions, however according to Neal Watson, President of the Bahamas Diving Association, he had continually warned Jim about the immense dangers of cageless dives with dangerous species. Unfortunately, Markus Groh, an Australian lawyer died affter being gnawed during a dive with Jim. The 49 year-old Groh died from blood loss in the Bahamas as Florida has banned the diving since 01'. Damn, that...I can't even imagine being gnawed to death by some shark as clearly you can't out run or out swim the damn thing. I am sure that you must have to sign some sort of waiver before doing one of these dangerous cageless dives. Rough way to go! Read

Starbucks Coffee will be closed from 530pm to 830pm for training...go somewhere else!!

Oh sweet Lord protect all of those who will be in the vicinity of the temporarily closed Starbucks Coffee shops, as not everyone clearly got the message and understandbly the blood of the innocents will flow like the River Jordan, Amen. Although I am kidding, you reallly don't know how some people are going to react, but just to be wayyy on the safe side, I will be indoors for that time period. I could imagine the streets looking like, Dawn of the Dead, 28 Days, or Resident Evil. The closing is supposed to be due to a nationwide retraining/Pep rally for their barristas, and depending on your area, Dunkin Donuts is offering their version of gourmet coffee drinks for only a buck from 1pm to 10pm. No word yet from, Coffee Bean or Peets if they will follow suit. Read

Judge: It's Okay To Sue Microsoft For "Vista Capable" Sticker

Remember the folks who brought you the "We're mad as hell about our Vista Capable PC that can't run Vista" Lawsuit?" Well it looks like they may see their day in court thanks to US District Court Judge Marsha Pechman.

But the suit is now limited to whether or not Microsoft deliberately inflated the cost during the 06 holiday season to squeeze a few more bucks out of machines they knew (allegedly) could not and would not be capable of running Vista.

Read

Health-Net has engaged in some despicable practices, screwing their policy holders...Chinese government executions please!!

In Lakewood, Ca Patsy Bates, a 52 year-old hairdresser suffering from breast cancer was left with more than 129k in unpaid medical bills when Health-Net Inc. cancelled her policy in 2004. She was just awarded $9million lawsuit payout by a California judge for her mental anguish and punitive damages. "The award came a day after the LA city attorney sued Health Net, claiming it illegally canceled the coverage of about 1600 patients. All of this was based on illegally running an incentive program in which it paid bonuses to an administrator for meeting targets of policy cancellations." Wow! Not that this kind of heartless behavior has never happened, but these policy holders paid their friggin money and trusted this company! Everyone guilty of signing off on this dine and dash procedure would be executed under my special brand cosumer justice based on the degree of gross misrepresentation. I am actually a very loving, empathetic, and altruistic guy, but pull foolishness like this and you punch the death ticket! Ms. Bates is presently in remission and was blessed by being able to continue her chemotherapy tratement through Medi-Cal/Medicare. Read

The five million dollar mistake....what would you have done?!!

In New York City, Benjamin Lovell a 48 year-old salesman was arraigned in a NYC on grand larceny charges after the Commerce Bank in New York had credited his account with $5million. Apparently, Mr. Lovell in December tried unsuccesfully to convince bank officials that they had made a mistake regarding his account, but continued to tell him that the money was indeed his. He ended up using $2million of the five before the bank realized that they had indeed credited the wrong person, another Benjamin Lovell who was a property manager. I have always been told that if the bank credits your account, go into the branch to get the necessary paperwork to verify the credit and talk to an account specialist. Now if it was my account with that kind of mistake, I would have contacted my lawyer and informed him of exactly was occuring and for this he wouldn't charge me, because the comedy of it all would have made his week. Don't get me wrong the temptation to take it and say "Hey you said it was mine!" is great but, in the banking world, finders keepers doesn't hold the same kind of weight. Read

Tragedy on the Clinton campaign!!

Today in Dallas, Texas a police motorcycle officer died as he was escorting Presidential Candidate, Hillary Clinton's motorcade to a rally. The unnamed officer apparently crashed into a concrete barrier along a viaduct near downtown Dallas. Sen. Clinton was quite shaken when she found out the status of the fallen officer, and we would like to extend our condolences to his family, friends, and fellow officers. Read

Information for anyone being forced to withdraw money from an atm!!

No one ever thinks that they may become the victim of a robbery, if you have ever been, it is the type of thing that takes a long time for you to recover. Here is a helpful tip I recently got from a friend and wanted to share with all of you, please pass it along. Knowledge is power.

If you should ever be forced by a robber to withdraw money from an
ATM machine, you can notify the police by entering your Pin # in
reverse.

For example if your pin number is 1234 then you would put in 4321.
The ATM recognizes that your pin number is backwards from the ATM card
you placed in the machine.

The machine will still give you the money you requested, but
unknown to the robber, the police will be immediately dispatched to help you.

This information was recently broadcast on FOX TV and it states
that it is seldom used because people don't know it exists.

Dubai Gets It's Man. DJ Grooverider Jailed For Four Years

Raymond Bingham AKA DJ Grooverider, a popular BBC Radio 1 DJ has taken up residence in Dubai, United Arab Emirates.

DJ Grooverider flew into Dubai for a spinning gig in November of last year with 2.16g of BUD/weed/wacky tobbaccie in his bag. One hell of a stupid move to be sure. Grooverider says he had left the dope in the pocket of his jeans and had forgotten about it. :Note to dopeheads: Apparently you can get through British Airports with 2.16g's of the chronic in the pockets of your jeans.

The DJ will spend four months in a hot ass Dubai prison with no wheels of steel. But he has two weeks to appeal.

Read

RIM Looks To Put Motorola Out Of It's Misery

RIM is charging after Motorola like Kimbo Slice after he drops his opponent to the canvas face down and completely limp. As if Motorola doesn't have enough issues trying to figure out what to do with its lagging cellphone business, RIM steps in with a big fat lawsuit.

9, count them, 9 counts of patent infringement will follow Motorola into a courtroom, but not without a few hay makers from Motorola who is counter suing. Both companies hold patents on various things that make cell/smartphones go, like QWERTY keyboards.

Ah yes, there's nothing like a good patent infringement case in the middle of the second month of a brand new year.

Read

Police ignore girlfriend's plea's for help in murder suicide!!

In Deland, Fla a preventable tragedy occured in which seventeen year-old Natasha Hall reached out to her local police numerous times after feeling threatened by her boyfriend Clay Coffner. Apparently she had called the police so many times, that they threatened to arrest her and her boyfriend, well that would have at least kept them safe, because the boyfriend ended up showing up at her door and he shot her in the head and killed himself. One her friends described Clay as a psycho, jealous, and abusive, and all too often this sort of behavior is copied by so many teenage boys. Parents need to communicate with one another when it comes to their children dating, this should have been nipped in the bud by the parents first, seeing the signs that Clay was out of control. Our sincere condolences go out to both families for lives that were lost too young and to the Police Dept. of Deland, you all should be held accountable for not at least paying a visit to both homes and taking a report, "I am soo sorry that you couldn't be bothered or that eating donuts or whatever the hell you were doing was much more important. Also, I am sure that none of you have any daughters, right?" Read